ODE TO MY MOTHER
Yesterday, January 30th, is the fourth death anniversary of my dear mother, ALICIA. It’s been four years, the grief is lesser now and of course the pain passes, but surely our love for her remains. For my Nanay, I know you’re happy wherever you are, this is for you:
ODE TO MY NANAY
Life continues but still empty
I am now home but
you’re not here anymore.
I still miss your voice
and your sunny laughter
I still search your face amongst the crowd.
I am longing for your wings
You left me in void
Which I can never fill up.
Wishing I was with you
During your dying hours
And said my last goodbye.
But I was not able to show
And say how much I love you
For the last time.
My heart is still broken
Coz I was not there
To take care of you.
I am still in pain
‘Coz I didn’t see your pain
Not even once.
My tears keep on falling
‘Coz I didn’t cry enough
‘Coz I didn’t mourn enough.
I saw you in my dreams
You are so beautiful and happy
I am at peace with that somehow.
I LOVE YOU NANAY
These words I failed to say
I ‘ll just blow kisses for you to the wind.
Here is your daughter
Longing for your embrace
Loving you forever.
January 31st, 2008 at 9:06 pm
sis, i really cried when i read your poem, coz my father also died last year and i was not there. i keep dreaming of my father too, kasi di ko pa siya nadadalaw yung puntod nya. di ako nakauwi kasi kakauwi ko lang last year that time buhay pa sya. sa panaginip ko na lang din sya nakikita na parang buhay pa. i miss my papa so much.
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February 1st, 2008 at 12:45 am
That’s a touching poem. Remember that loved ones may die in body but their spirit continues to live through you, your actions, your mannerisms, and your carrying on of their legacy. We actually wrote a nice story about this about 4 days ago which may uplift you to some degree. Obviously you can delete this comment if you think it’s spam but i really hope you’ll read the story as it applies to this situation.
http://imaniceperson.com/PHP-Nuke/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=177&mode=thread&order=0&thold=-1
Have a NICE day!
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February 2nd, 2008 at 3:06 am
@richelle - hi,sis!don’t worry, like my nanay, for sure, your father understands that. Ako, i was able to go home for her funeral before, but of course, like any other loss, the pain is still there. Grieving continuous, but like me, give your time to mourn. Nweis, musta ang job application? I started my work today.hay, naninibago pa ko.hehe.
@Imaniceperson - thanks for that post. I just read it, and you’re right, we should keep their positive influences in our memory banks.
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February 12th, 2008 at 9:51 pm
so sad
i love my nanay so much too! im back in bulacan na ulet! hehe! miss ko na nanay ko tuloy!!!
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October 23rd, 2008 at 4:50 am
naiyak naman ako sa poem mo ,
For 9days na nahospitalize si Nanay gising sya for 2days nakita nya mga malalapit na kaibigang dumalaw sa kanya tapos natulog for 2days and she was diagnosed of a deep coma komplikasyon na ng sakit nya ,walang araw na hindi ako umiiyak nagdasal ako na “Lord baka pwedeng bawasan mo ng 15years ang buhay ko at ibigay mo na sa Nanay ko gusto ko syang tumanda na kasama kami” alam ko na may plano ang Diyos, 2days syang hindi gumigising at nung kinagabihan gumising sya lahat kami masayang masaya sabi ko narinig na ni Lord panalangin ko …nakatingin si nanay sa amin nakangiti kahit hindi na sya nakakapagsalita pinaparamdam nya na wag kami mag-alala, akala ko maiuuwi na namin sya , hindi na pala tuluyan na syang natulog ulit siguro un na ung hiningi kong chance na makita ulit kami ni nanay kahit isang araw lang at tuluyan na nga syang natulog (deep coma) but that day before she passed away ako lang magisa nagbantay sa kanya kinausap ko sya na “Nay kung kaya mo pa lumaban ka, kung hindi mo na kaya at nahihirapan ka na sige magpahinga ka na”..that night before she died umuwi muna kami ni tatay sa bahay para makapagpahinga, Allan , tito rod and tito Gil were in the hospital para magbantay siguro gusto ni nanay na wala kami ni tatay sa hospital para hindi namin makita na hinang hina na sya, pagbalik namin sa hospital un na, bumitiw na sya……masakit hanggang ngaun pero proud ako kay Nanay kasi nakita ko kung gaano sya kaEspesyal na tao sa dami ng dumalaw at dumamay sa atin ng nakaratay pa sya, Sa dami ng kaibigang nagdasal..
During the funeral march at pagdating sa church hindi na ako makaiyak ,nawala sandali ang lungkot ko dahil nakita kong napakaraming tao na nakiramay at sumama sa libing patunay lang na mabuti syang tao;mabait na kapatid at kaibigan higit sa lahat responsableng magulang, alam ko na nakapasok na si Nanay sa langit, bagay na nakapagpasaya na sa akin. Hindi man sya mayaman sa materyal na bagay napakayaman naman nya sa kaibigan dahil nagpundar sya ng magandang pakikisama,
masaya ako pag nakikita ko sya sa panaginip ko,
miss ko na matinis nyang boses sa mga sermon nya sa akin, mga pagkurot nya sa akin pag naiinis na sya sa katigasan ng ulo ko,
miss ko na magkaron ng Nanay …
Higit sa lahat miss ko na ang GOTO ni Nanay…
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