
Yesterday morning, I attended a recollection hosted by our university. It was just a half-day activity, simple and yet brought out the spirituality in me. What struck me is the video shown about empathy. Empathy is often characterized as “putting oneself into another’s shoes”, or emotionally putting yourself in the place of another. According to R. R. Greenson, to empathize means to share, to experience the feelings of another person.
For us to emphatize, we need to be aware and sensitive of another person’s feelings. During the recollection’s video presentation, a father talked about his transformation to a good father and husband. He narrated that before he and his wife joined a marriage encounter, he was very short-tempered - to the point that he often hurt his wife and kids physically aside from the verbal abuse. He said his transformation is hard, however, with faith and by learning how to be sensitive of his family’s feelings, he was able to control his temper and everyday is still a learning process for him. But the most important thing, he said, is learning to forgive himself with all the hurt he caused his family.
On a personal note, I am touched with this man’s sharing, coz it reminded me of how I snap sometimes when the kids are getting so cheeky. Counting 1 to 100 doesn’t always work, so sometimes I can’t help but shout at them without listening to them first or asking what really happened. For this lenten season, specially since I will have more time to spend with my 3 beautiful kids, I hope I’d succeed on understanding them more and be sensitive on their feelings. I love them so much, no doubt about that, however, I can’t help sometimes not to get angry and raise my voice, specially when they quarrel. That is one virtue I really have to learn.
Empathy should not just be given to our loved ones, but I think we should also be sensitive to other people around us. I hope after this lenten, I will be more empathizing not just to my kids and family, but also to others - neighbors, students, co-workers, and even to those whom I don’t know. And to have empathy, we should also have LOVE, FAITH & PATIENCE, lots of them! It’s a tall order and for sure a long process, but even small steps would go a long way.
Have a blessed Lenten Season - let us all strengthen our faith!